Kick 'Em When They're Up, Kick 'Em When They're Down

I am very, very happy I was running errands yesterday afternoon. If I hadn't been out and about, I might have been tempted to turn on the TV and watch the dramatic "Balloon Boy" story unfold, against my better judgment. Instead, I was on the bus, making my way from one place to another, when I checked Twitter and saw message after message about this six-year-old kid who was apparently soaring high above Colorado in a runaway makeshift hot air balloon/flying saucer thingy. ?!?!

Upon reading bits and pieces of the story (and then checking CNN.com for more info), I became totally nauseous. I couldn't believe there were live feeds of the balloon's treacherous flight. EVERYONE THOUGHT THERE WAS A YOUNG BOY TRAPPED IN THE BASKET! What exactly were these media outlets going to do if all of a sudden this kid (named Falcon, oh irony of ironies) peered over the side and tipped out? Seriously, I need to understand what their plan was. Were they going to show a young child falling to the earth? Or were they just going to cut away? Fade to black? It's sickening that I (and most likely others) even need to wonder about this, but this whole episode just underscores the main reason I don't watch any news programs: they're all about getting the scoop, without regard to taste or decency or consequences.

Listen to me, sounding like I'm ninety years old. "Back in MY day... we didn't even have TV... we would just all sit around looking at each other for hours... and we liked it, dammit, WE LOVED IT!" Clearly, something about this Balloon Boy saga has riled me up. I know it's awful and uncomfortable to think about what might have happened if this story didn't have a happy ending, but while all of the various shows are grilling the Heene family this morning (and poor Falcon has already thrown up twice in the middle of these interviews), asking whether or not the entire thing was a hoax, no one's asking the only question I want an answer to: what were they going to do if this kid was in the balloon like everyone assumed he was, and he fell out while they had their live feed going? I want someone to own up to their plan!

I personally couldn't care less if the whole thing was a hoax. It doesn't change the fact that reporters bought it and were all over it like white on rice. It brings to mind the wise and true words of Don Henley in the awesome, awesome song "Dirty Laundry":

We got the bubble-headed bleach-blonde who comes on at five
She can tell you 'bout the plane crash with a gleam in her eye
It's interesting when people die --
Give us dirty laundry.


Ugh. Anyway, I'm sure we're going to hear lots more about Balloon Boy (which I feel silly typing, much less saying) over the coming days and weeks. There will be Balloon Boy skits on Saturday Night Live, Halloween costumes, magazine covers, you name it. I'm just glad the kid is safe and that my "What if?" worry wasn't realized.

- e

My First-Ever Radio Gig

I posted this on Facebook a few days ago, but I know many of you have resisted the temptation that is social networking thus far and therefore didn't see it, so here's a link to my radio spot on KPAM for redbox:

I didn't make a total fool out of myself.

Yay!

I'll be back with the KPAM crew on October 23, so stay tuned...

- e

Hear Ye, Hear Ye... Hear Me!

For those of you who've been reading both this blog and Long Live Locke over the years but have never had the extreme great pleasure of meeting me (I kid), tomorrow (Friday) morning you will at least have a chance to put a voice with my pictures and writing. As part of my work with redbox, I'm going to be on KPAM radio in Portland every third Friday or so (if things go well) starting this week. However, you don't need to be in Oregon to tune in... you can do so by clicking on the "Listen Live" link in the upper-right of KPAM's site. I've tried it out, it works! Fellow redblog writers and film critics James Rocchi and Locke Peterseim will be rotating duties on the other Fridays -- and they are awesome -- so you should check out their spots as well.

I will be going on a few minutes after 9 AM EST (yep, that's 6 AM for the early-risers on the west coast) and will talk for 6 - 8 minutes about the week's theatrical and DVD releases. My first spot tomorrow will focus on Zombieland and Whip It, as well as Monsters vs. Aliens, The Brothers Bloom and Management.

I should be getting an .MP3 of my bit on their morning show a few days afterward, but am not sure if I will be able to upload that on this site. So... regardless of whether or not you're able to catch me live, please please please send me good luck vibes! I'm not nervous now, but I'm sure I will be once I start preparing everything tonight.

- e

PS - On a completely unrelated note, I googled "Hear ye, hear ye!" before writing this post to ensure I was spelling it correctly. The first result that popped up was a blog entitled "Hear ye! Hear ye!" and I spent a few minutes browsing through it. I'm glad I did, because I found some ridiculously cute pictures of guinea pigs!!! I used to own two guinea pigs: one (Piggy -- yep, I'm not that creative) during college and another (Chewie) right after I graduated from Michigan. I loved them dearly, and so I really got a kick out of these pics... as well as these. Check them out -- if you don't crack a smile, you just might not have a heart!