Still Searching for a Miracle in a Bottle

Time for another chapter of "e Spends A Lot of Money on Cosmetic Products!" And to my male readers - don't worry - a very manly post is on the way for tomorrow, I promise...

But in the meantime, for the beauty product-obsessed, I bring you some good news this time around... I have been using Estée Lauder's Advanced Night Repair for over a year, and I still really like it and will keep using it, even though it's $73 a pop (you can get a smaller-sized bottle, though). I was waiting to write about this product because, since I'm always on the lookout for even better, more miraculous lotions and potions, I had been using a trial of AlphaDerma CE for a few weeks and wanted to be able to compare the two for those of you who are into this kind of thing.

But before getting into the comparison, I will share how I even came upon Estée Lauder's infamous "little brown bottle" in the first place. There was an ad for it on the back of InStyle magazine a long, long time ago, and it touted this web site for the product. I went to the site and got sucked in by the never-ending "testimonials" from people who had been using the product for nearly two decades and claimed to look significantly younger than their real ages. I figured I would give it a try - in this day and age, any product that actually can stick around for twenty years is pretty rare and is a testament to the fact that people like it enough to keep shelling out the cash for it. By the way, they are still running ads for ANR on the back of InStyle, I just checked the October 2007 issue. But for some inexplicable reason, the testimonials have been taken off of the web site.

So I went into what was at that point Marshall Field's (now Macy's) and the sales girl pumped me up about the product even more. She assured me that I could exchange it (but not return it for a refund) if I had a bad reaction to it, but claimed that no one had ever returned it. She then told me that they just so happened to have a few of the rare 2.5 oz, $90 bottles in stock, which are a really good deal when you consider that the 1 oz bottles are $46.5o. I figured "What the hell," and bought the $90 bottle.

But wait - BONUS FOR e!!!! When I got home, I realized that there were TWO bottles in the bag! The 2.5 oz one AND a 1.7 oz one. If you think for one second that I actually returned the extra one, then you are crazy. I thanked my lucky stars and then prayed that the stuff was actually good, or else I would have to sell the unused bottle on eBay or something.

Since that point in time I have used all of the products in this "complex." The concentrate, the normal serum and the eye area-specific serum. I don't think I'll ever use the concentrate again... that is the stuff you are supposed to use for 21 days to "kick-start" your new regime, and then again every 4 months or so. It was fine, but I don't feel like it did anything significantly different from the normal serum.

The directions say to use the Advanced Night Repair product at night, but the counter people will tell you to use it in the morning, too. I followed their advice and use it twice a day.

So what exactly does it do? I'll tell you what it doesn't do first. It is not an acne-fighting product, so, you will still need to use something else to combat break-outs. What it does do is smooth the skin and make it seem more "glowy." I don't really know how to describe it, but even my husband noticed a difference when I was first using it a year ago - and you know that guys never notice anything like that! You can read the site I linked to above or this page on Estée Lauder's site to understand what exactly it is supposed to be doing for your skin. The only thing I would forewarn you about is if you buy the eye area serum, which I use and like as well, more is not necessarily better. I was globbing that stuff on and that did irritate my eyelid - it was just too much. After I stopped spreading it on so thickly I have never had any problems. And I never broke out from the overall face serum, either, which is a freaking miracle.

So why did I stray from the ANR and try AlphaDerma CE? Well, while the ANR does say that it helps fight future wrinkles and smooth current ones, it's not really known as a "wrinkle-reducing product." Whereas AlphaDerma CE is. One day I was feeling particularly bad about the state of my forehead so I starting researching the latest and greatest new products. I think what started my search was an ad for LiftFusion. Once I realized that that crap was $130, I figured I better make SURE it was good before buying it. When I started digging around online, all signs seemed to point to AlphaDerma CE being the way to go instead. But that stuff is of course expensive, too. Which is why I was extremely happy to find this "5 Day Sample" kit of all of Janson Beckett's top products at Skinstore.com.

I only used 2 of the 4 products that came in the kit - the AlphaDerma CE, obviously, and this stuff called Okusil which is for the eye area. The good news is that neither irritated my skin (once again, this is miraculous in and of itself), and I actually feel like the Okusil serum did tighten my eyelids a bit. However, I didn't notice any difference in my forehead wrinkles after using the AlphaDerma CE. And the 5-day supply lasted past 2 weeks, so I figured I should see something. I was really disappointed, because I had totally bought into the hype and was astonished by the supposedly untouched photos that users sent in to the web site.

Now after looking at all of these sites and testimonials and pictures again I wonder if I shouldn't give AlphaDerma CE another go, and just suck it up and buy the actual bottle (rather than the sample size) and use it only on my forehead for a few months and see what happens. I will continue to use ANR on the rest of my face. Does anyone out there have any experience with AlphaDerma CE? I need to know! BE AN ENABLER!

- e

Rental Reviews: Shattered Glass, Miami Vice and Knocked Up

Where have all the good movies gone? They don't seem to be in my Netflix queue, that's for sure. You know the state of the film industry is bad when I enjoyed watching the Entourage Season 3 discs way more than I liked any of the following movies...

Shattered Glass

I always am interested in films that are based on true stories, and was kept entertained by this one - which followed the career of Stephen Glass, a journalist for the political magazine The New Republic. You may remember this one from the news - he ended up getting fired when it was uncovered that he made up a great deal of his stories - but not until after he had tricked some of the most prestigious publications out there into running his pieces. The problem with the movie, which had a wonderful supporting cast, was Hayden Christensen. He sucked as Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader and he wasn't much better as Stephen Glass. I think the way he talks is what bugs me - he has a strange accent that seems forced - Long Island mixed with Canadian - I don't know how to describe it. It was way worse in this movie than in the Star Wars movies. The interesting thing about the DVD, however, was that it included a 60 Minutes interview with the real kid, who still appears to be quite sketchy. If you are intrigued with "how in the hell did he/she get away with that?"-type of stories and can deal with Hayden's weird voice and fairly crappy acting skills, then you may actually like this movie.


Miami Vice

I swear to you, I thought I had read great reviews of this movie somewhere - that's the only reason why I recently moved Miami Vice up to the top of our Netflix queue. But good God, this movie was awful. It was AWFUL. I am ashamed that I watched it. There was absolutely nothing redeeming about it. Colin Farrell wasn't even cute in it. He was chubby and had the worst hair EVER, possibly even beating his bad wig in Alexander, which is saying something. He really puzzled me in this movie because I know he is not a bad actor, yet he delivered his lines like he was going for Worst Performance of All Time. Very stilted dialogue and awkward movements. I don't remember the "real" Sonny Crockett being like that, so I chalk it up to bad directing. Anyway, everything was bad. My husband and I had basically no idea what was going on for most of the film. We were also incredibly mad that they didn't use the original theme song from the TV series, NOR did they use Phil Collins' "In the Air Tonight." HOW COULD THEY NOT USE THAT SONG?!?!? Instead they put in a God-awful remake by some metal band called Nonpoint. I'm getting all bitter again just thinking about it. Do not see this movie.

One good thing did come from me suffering through two hours of Colin's mullet, however. I was looking up "In the Air Tonight," and just learned that that song isn't about Phil Collins seeing some dude drown. That is an urban legend - the song is about nothing. Urban legends die hard!

Knocked Up

I had no desire to see this movie when it was a big hit in theaters this summer because I: 1) don't like Seth Rogen, 2) don't like Katherine Heigl/don't watch Grey's Anatomy, 3) am already scared enough as it is by childbirth, and 4) knew that Seth and his friends were a bunch of stoners, and that kind of comedy is not funny to me. But, I was willing to give it a try in the comfort of my own home, as I could always turn it off or leave my husband to watch it alone if I wasn't into it. I must say that I was pleasantly surprised... but only because I had extremely low expectations. It was not as funny as I figured it would be - it was actually much more serious than the trailers and reviews had let on. Perhaps that was the reason why I thought it was OK... because the "funny" parts were actually my least favorite segments of the film, but there was more substance to the rest of the story than I would've ever expected in a summer hit. I still don't like Seth Rogen, but I can tolerate Katherine Heigl a little bit more now. I guess the bottom line here is that I do not regret watching this movie.

With all the crap on the big screen and the small screen this fall, I really need to get going on my big stack of books and magazines, because I'm getting too depressed.

- e

Radiohead to Music Industry: This is What You Get, When You Mess With Us

As some of you old-timers may remember, I went to a Radiohead concert last summer, as they are one of my favorite bands (and one of the only bands my husband and I actually both like) -- The Bends graces my 'top 5 favorite CDs of all time' list. While I definitely enjoyed the show, one of my complaints was that they played a bunch of songs that I didn't know. So now I feel all cool because I recognize many of those songs on their controversial new album, In Rainbows.

Their first release since 2003 isn't causing drama because of the actual songs, but rather, as I'm sure you've heard by now, because of the fact that they are directly distributing it to fans through a web site which lets the user determine how much to pay for it. My husband had already downloaded it and we've been listening to it for the past few days, but I decided this morning that I wanted to go through the beginning of the ordering process myself. Because I am a big nerd, I got a huge kick out of it. It's not the most user-friendly site in the world, but it is kind of funny. Once you order the download (there is also an option to order the physically delivered "discbox" (read: box set) for $80 that ships on December 3rd and includes the digital download as well) you can view your "basket" and then that's where you can enter in whatever price you deem the album worthy of, up to 99 British pounds (roughly $200). Next to the field where you enter in the amount, there is a question mark. When you click on it, you go to a screen that says, "It's up to you." And then there's another question mark, which links to another screen that insists, "No really, it's up to you." After chuckling at that, I went back to the shopping cart screen and entered in zeros for the price and then hit "Pay now." The next screen contained a message that read, "We value your custom. You are now in a queue," and it looked like it was starting to process something. So I hit the Back button on my browser and typed in "10" and hit "Pay now" and it went to a screen where you need to start entering in your information. Incredible. Now at least I know that the band "values the custom" of getting something for nothing.

So of course this play by Radiohead is scaring the crap out of the big music labels, because it's showing that they can be cut out of the picture. Radiohead's contract expired with their old label, EMI, in 2003, which is why they can now try out the direct distribution method. And since they're probably banking on a good percentage of their fans to cough up way more money than they would normally pay for a CD acquired by normal means just to send a message to The Man, there is really no risk for them to have tried this out. While both Prince and the band The Charlatans have employed similar "take our stuff for free" strategies before, nothing like this has been done on such a wide scale. As lauded by many critics, the move was pure marketing genius.

But what about the actual music? Is it even any good?

I don't claim to be a sophisticated music reviewer, I just know what I like. And I really like In Rainbows. I was going to list off the tracks I am digging the most, but then realized that they added up to about half of the album. Let's just say I like the slower ones better.

So what are you waiting for? Go get it! It's free!!!!

Or is it?

- e

e's Favorite Things: Message Tees

I've decided that I need to add a new category of posts to balance out my "Pet Peeve of the Week" gripes and the overall snarky nature of this blog. To show that I am not always bitter about something, today I begin an ongoing series of entries that I will call "e's Favorite Things," or eFT for short. I won't write about obvious passions of mine with posts like "I love Lost," or "I like watching movies" or "Aren't pirates awesome?" I promise.

Since I wanted to make sure that eFT didn't already stand for something that was perhaps profane or embarrassing, I googled it, and now I think my choice of term is PERFECT. Because eFT (or, EFT actually) also stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques that are all about getting your body's energy field back in order to combat negative thinking and all this other hippie-sounding stuff. AWESOME!

So this inaugural eFT post is about my love for message tees. You know, t-shirts that have funny sayings (usually referring to some pop culture phenomenon) on them. I've mentioned my "Pirates Arrr Cool" t-shirt in several other posts, but that's not the only one I have, trust. However, now that I don't need to keep buying expensive suits and outfits dedicated to working for The Man, I feel the need to refresh my supply of comfy message tees. Therefore, today I actually clicked on one of the wacky t-shirt ads that are always flashing in the margins of the gossip sites I visit. Wow, are there some awesome ones out there! I am going to have a hard time figuring out what to buy. As you are about to see, I have quite a few favorites. All of these came from Noisebot.com, which has a ton of other clever ones that I haven't seen elsewhere.

I was first struck by this one, because of my love for Gandalf. If my cousins start messing around in school, they will receive this ominous t-shirt from me:


For myself, perhaps it's time for a new pirate t-shirt?



For fans of The Office and Entourage, respectively:




My brother used to have The Usual Suspects movie poster in his room. Perhaps he should get this updated version where the suspects have ganged up on poor Verbal:



If you ever played The Oregon Trail back in school, there's more to worry about than dying from dysentery nowadays:



For my peeps in Seattle:


For the extreme nerd in all of us:



But I think the one I have to actually buy comes from another great site, Busted Tees.



Time to stock up!

- e

Things I Did When I Gave Up Looking for Frodo, Part One

It's a slow news day, folks. Therefore, I thought I would grant the request for more pictures from my New Zealand trip last year. However, there's still no way I'm uploading any of the scene re-enactments! Instead, I have included below some of the highlights of the vacation that are not Lord of the Rings related, just to prove that I am not 100% insane.

Let's begin in Auckland, where we stayed for just one day. We went to the beach where The Piano was filmed, but it wasn't that exciting (and I hadn't even seen the movie). What was pretty cool was the Minus 5 bar.


It's kind of touristy, but worth visiting nonetheless. It's a bar made completely out of ice - as in, pretty much everything is ice - the bar itself, the glasses, the seats, the walls, the floor, you name it. Their big shtick is that they give you a parka and gloves and you can only stay in there for 30 minutes, or else you essentially freeze. We had to go in the early evening because we were about to keel over from jet lag, so there wasn't anybody else there. But that gave us time to look at all the crazy ice sculptures around the room, and talk to the bartender quite a bit. He made us a blue drink that looked like anti-freeze but it was the best drink I had on the trip, I tell you. If you are interested in going to a Minus 5 bar, there are 3 in Australia, 2 in New Zealand and one in the Caribbean. I would recommend it, just because it's a pretty unique experience. If you have time, you should also read their FAQ page, because it includes what I found to be some fascinating information about how they run the place and make all the ice. But I also see that it says you aren't allowed to take pictures in there. Oops!

After leaving Auckland, we made our way inland to Rotorua, where we went to the Agrodome. This is the entrance to the park, so I had to get out of the car and give props to the Lord of the Rams.


I have mentioned the Agrodome before in my review of Merino Lanolin Skin Creme, as that's where I bought it. If you would like to be entertained, I highly, highly suggest you check out the Agrodome's site. Who would think to combine extreme sports with farm shows? Only crazy kiwis, that's who.


There I am, second from the right, taking part in the sheep show. Do you see the swarms of sheep behind me? They were really well trained! Anyway, I was a little worried about what they were going to make us do up there, but shortly after this picture was taken, a whole bunch of baby lambs came out on the stage and I got to feed one, so it was all good. If this whole writing thing doesn't work out for me, I'm totally going to go back and work at the Agrodome.

My husband put up with the sheep show and the organic farm tour, which was great - we got to taste kiwi wine (too sweet for my taste) and get up close with tons of llamas, emus, ostriches and alpacas. I was in heaven. But then I had to put up with him achieving one of his main goals of the trip - to go Zorbing. If you look closely you will see two huge inflatable spheres on either side of a station at the top of the hill. My husband was in the one on the left.



There is another sphere inside of these contraptions, and they put a bit of water in it, and then crazy people like my husband get inside (they give the crazy people wet suits), it gets sealed shut, and they push the Zorb down the hill. You are supposed to try to stand up and run while the Zorb is careening down the hill (think of a hamster wheel), but most people slip and fall and get sloshed all around until someone stops the ball at the base of the hill. My husband got about 8 steps under his belt and then fell. He said it was extremely fun, but a little freaky because there is no way out. Not for claustrophobics! No, I did not take part. This was early on in the trip and I didn't want to get sent to the hospital before finding Frodo and Gandalf.


The guy above eventually decided to let my husband out. It looks really gross, like the ball is giving birth to a human or something.

I have a few other pictures that I have deemed "safe for the blogosphere," but I think this post is long enough for now. The next time I have nothing else to write about, which may be very soon because it seems like all the celebrities have decided to let Britney Spears take the limelight and I refuse to write anything else about her for a while, I will post Part Two... and then Part Three.

Have a good weekend,
- e

Lewis Carroll was on Crack

A month or so ago, I went to a play called Lookingglass Alice that was inspired by Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking-Glass, both by Lewis Carroll. (There's a video of clips from the play in the link I included above.) I was very familiar with these stories before going to the show, but it was during the play that I realized that Lewis Carroll must have been smoking some major crack, because the characters and dialogue are really tripped out. However, I have since done some investigation, and it doesn't appear that they had any crack back in the late 1800s. Furthermore, there seems to be no proof that L.C. was ever on any drugs at all! Sorry to all you hippies who were so very inspired by the hookah-smoking caterpillar from the Alice in Wonderland movie. He was not speaking directly to you, I hate to break it to you. But I'm still pretty sure that the song "White Rabbit" was about drugs, if that makes you feel any better. Feed your head! (As a complete aside, I found out that Madonna's song "Material Girl" shares the same bass line as "White Rabbit." I find that interesting, so I thought I would share. I learn so much random trivia researching for these blog posts, it's crazy.)

So if Lewis Carroll wasn't on drugs, then he was definitely crazy. The peeps back in his day didn't know what to make of him or others like him, so they decided to create a whole genre to file them under: literary nonsense. A great example of literary nonsense is this snippet from one of Mr. Carroll's famous poems, "Jabberwocky":

"'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"

Saaayyyy whaaaaaa? Yeah, it makes no sense. I wish I could just make up a ton of words, throw them together and become a famous poet! Seriously, the spell-checker is having a nervous breakdown over that poem.

Anyway, while I was watching Lookingglass Alice, which incorporated all of the famous characters from the Alice-centric stories, I realized that even though Lewis Carroll (whose real name was Charles Lutwidge Dodgson, by the way) was clearly insane, his works provided the inspiration for many things that I have a bit more appreciation for. There are way, way too many to name, but a few of note (in my mind) are:
- "I am the Walrus" by The Beatles
- The "Don't Come Around Here No More" video by Tom Petty, which scared the living bejeezus out of me in sixth grade
- All of the Alice references in my favorite show, Lost
- The Mad Hatter Tea Cup rides at Disneyland and Disney World. Disneyland also has a kiddie ride in addition to the tea cup ride (which makes me sick) where you cruise around in giant caterpillars. I would've totally gone on that when I was there back in March, but the line was too long and it was too hot to work up a sweat pushing the little kids out of the way. But I still got to chill with the Cheshire Cat!



For those of you who are all cultured and snobby and into theater, you may be interested to know that the Lookingglass Theater was founded by David Schwimmer (annoying, whiny Ross on Friends) and a handful of other students at Northwestern University about 20 years ago.

All of this talk of the tea cup ride has made me realize that I'm late, I'm late, for a very important date - with my daily cup 'o Earl Grey...

- e

My Vote is Yes, J. Lo's Pregnant

Before I say anything else, I want to acknowledge the ridiculous fact that I spent ten minutes "researching" how to spell Jennifer Lopez's nickname - is it JLo, J-Lo, J Lo or J. Lo? These are the things I waste my time doing, and I am ashamed.

For those of you who ever inexplicably find yourself with that same question, there doesn't appear to be any official answer - it's spelled all sorts of different ways across magazines and newspaper articles and web sites, but J. Lo seemed to be the most prevalent, so that's what I ran with.

Now that we've gotten that extremely important bit of business out of the way... the reason I chose to write about our favorite Jenny From The Block this morning is because I watched her interview with David Letterman last night. We were in the process of going through all of the late-night talk shows that had accumulated on Tivo - we record Jay Leno, David Letterman, Conan O'Brien and Jon Stewart every night (and yes, I know those aren't the real names of the shows, but that's how I refer to them - it's easier). It's very rare that we ever actually watch one of those shows in full - we mostly just see who's a guest from the episode description and immediately delete it if we're not interested, or forward through to the segment we want to see. Last night we were blowing away tons of old episodes, and my husband was just about to cancel the David Letterman show that was currently recording, when I cried, "WAIT!!! I heard Jennifer Lopez is supposed to announce she's pregnant on this one!"

So we watched it... and... nothing. While Dave made lots of knowing comments about raising a family that resulted in anticipatory breath-holding and nervous laughter from the audience, he did not come right out and ask her if she was expecting. Nor did Diane Sawyer, when J. Lo was on Good Morning America. You know it's because J. Lo's got some wicked lawyers threatening everyone!

When Marc Anthony, her husband, released a statement last month denying that there was a baby on the way, I believed it for a few days. But if there really is nothing to report, then why doesn't she put the rumors to rest by wearing something OTHER than a muumuu every day? On Letterman she wore a very pretty, but extremely pouffy and unfitted green dress. During all of her concerts (she's currently on tour), she's wearing these baggy, shapeless, flowing gowns every night and not busting out any of her oh-so-famous former-Fly Girl dance moves. And then inevitably the wind machines will kick up her outfits so that the grandma stretch pants holding back a growing stomach are revealed, like in the picture at the top of this post.

So, I don't think Jennifer, who's obviously taking a page out of the Christina Aguilera playbook, is going to make a formal announcement any time soon. Perhaps this blind item from the end of September, that many suspect is about Jennifer and Marc, uncovers the reason: "This Superstar Celebrity is finally pregnant. She has been trying for years to conceive with her hubby. Now that she’s finally pregnant, she can’t say anything. She is going on tour with her hubby, and they stand to lose a lot of money if they have to cancel any dates. Sources say she’s expecting twins, so she won’t be able hide her condition much longer."

Us Weekly faked me out this morning with their cover "confirming" that J. Lo is pregnant, but if you read the article you will see that they didn't get their information from the couple but rather from "several sources close to the couple." Like, uh, Damien Fahey, the MTV VJ.

After looking at several pictures of her from the last few days and seeing her on TV last night, I definitely think J. Lo is pregnant. If that is the case, I can see why she's not saying anything just yet... she has admitted in the past to IVF treatments and I'm sure she wants to be absolutely sure that everything's OK before the media onslaught that will follow if she were to confirm that she is "with child." I personally really like Jennifer Lopez and hope that all goes well for her. Her cinematic masterpiece, Maid in Manhattan, was a damn good movie - admit it! I think Marc Anthony is ugly as hell and lives up to his tabloid nickname of "Skeletor," but as they say, love is blind. She seems happy, so I'm happy for her.

Now the real question is - if they do have a baby (or babies if the twin rumors are true)... what on earth will they name it/them? If she has a girl I hope she names it after her mother, Guadalupe, because that is a really fun name to say. Say it out loud and then tell me I'm wrong. Then they could shorten it to Lupe and all sorts of crazy nicknames would abound .... Lil' Lupe, Lupe Lopez, LuLo, Loco Lupe... the possibilities are endless. J. Lo, are you listening?

- e

Everything's Better with Ranch

When I stopped working for The Man, I had this vision in my head that I was going to work out for several hours each day like all the celebrities do. Because, let's face it, that's the only way anyone can actually be in the shape your average famous person is in. I saw myself going to the local market twice a week, snacking on fresh fruit every day, riding my bike to and from Navy Pier early each morning, going to the gym during the day when no one was there, taking my dog for an hour-long walk along the lake every night, maybe even throwing in a few of my old Tae Bo tapes now and then for good measure. I was going to be the epitome of good health and fitness.

That hasn't exactly happened. By and large, I do eat fairly healthy foods. Any bread, English muffin, bagel or tortilla that goes into my mouth is always 100% whole wheat. I don't drink any pop ("soda" for you east-coasters) whatsoever. I eat a lot of berries and apples. I read every health-related magazine there is, including Nutrition Action (which I highly recommend for those interested in this sort of thing - it's published by the non-profit Center for Science in the Public Interest, has won many awards, Oprah is a big fan, and it's totally cheap!), so I know all the stuff to look for in any food I buy - be it groceries or out at a restaurant.

But every once in a while, I just have to indulge in treats that I know are awful for me. Like last night, I was out having a drink with a friend (shout-out to FC), and as soon as I saw "Mac 'n Cheese Bites" on the menu, my mind was made up. I pictured these little globules of pasta dripping with creamy cheese, but they were much worse than that. They were FRIED puffs of macaroni and cheese with ranch dressing dipping sauce! They rocked. This is coming from a girl who will get a deep-dish pizza and still order ranch on the side to dunk each bite into - which has made grown men watching me do this quite queasy. I love me some ranch!

Anyway, I'm trying to not be so hard on myself about failing to work out around the clock. I haven't gained any weight since I stopped working, I do get to the gym many times a week, I do walk my dog way more than I used to, and I still don't have a car so I walk to more places than most people in this country would ever dream. Most importantly, however, is the fact that the seal on the one bottle of ranch I have in my condo has remained unbroken. When I give in and open it and start pouring it on my whole-wheat bagel with low-fat cream cheese, I'll know there's a serious problem.

And with that, I'm off to the gym.

- e

It's Not Over 'Til... Tomorrow?

Here are three truths:

- It is October 8th, 2007.
- It was 89 degrees in Chicago yesterday...
- And it will be 87 degrees here today.

If global warming is wrong, I don't want to be right!

I kid, I kid. But seriously, this is crazy. About 10,000 of the 45,000 runners registered for yesterday's Chicago Marathon chose not to run because of the heat. I'll let you click here to read about the other sad events that the humidity and heat caused in the race.

This is why it's so lame for all the clothing stores to start selling winter clothes when Labor Day rolls around. Summer is still here in full effect - why do I want to get all depressed thinking about blizzards when I walk by The Gap and see corduroys and sweaters?

Apparently, however, the end of summer is truly nigh. We're supposed to get a big storm tonight and then the extended forecast said that the temperature will be in the sixties from that point on.

Which means that I need to head outside with the dog and start living it up for one last hurrah!

- e

It's Still Funny...

Yeah, I know it's been over a week since Saturday Night Live premiered and bestowed upon us this hilarious digital short, but I am STILL singing it! And since this past weekend's installment of the show was a yawner, I keep going back to the brilliance that is 'I Ran So Far Away.'

Best lyrics of all time:
He ran
For the President of Iran
We ran
Together to a tropical island

The special guest appearance at 2:51 (or, 10 seconds left) is pretty classic, too.

If you haven't seen this video yet, you must, you must!

The kicker for NBC is that they somehow failed to secure the digital rights to this video?!?! After threatening YouTube with lawsuits if clips of any NBC shows are uploaded and dropping iTunes because they wouldn't raise prices for episodes of The Office and other network hits, they forget to legally cover what they must have known would generate huge Internet buzz? Duh! Now they can't upload the video to their own site because they didn't get the rights from the guy (Richard James, aka Aphex Twin) whose song they use in it. Funny how what comes around goes around. It serves them right for being so lame about YouTube and iTunes- this is the year 2007, guys, DEAL WITH IT. It reminds me of when the big music companies were claiming that the sky was falling when Napster first came out. Evolve with the times, peeps! iTunes didn't end up being so bad for you all now, did it? Freaking out about new technology is just one more example of why The Man is poop!

- e

A Look Back on Middle-Earth

The possibility of The Hobbit being made into a movie got me thinking about my LOTR-inspired trip to Middle-Earth (New Zealand) last year. I realized I never shared any pictures from this trip with you, my dear readers. Now you can witness how truly crazy your blogger friend e is, as below is proof that I sought out movie locations all over the country during the two weeks I was there. I kept the most embarrassing photos (scene reenactments with other nerdy travelers) to myself though - ha!

The small town of Matamata is the home of the set of Hobbiton. Before the movies, the only people coming through Matamata were travelers "seeking out a bathroom," according to a documentary we watched while flying over on Air New Zealand. Now Matamata hosts a thriving visitor's center, from which Hobbiton tours depart.


When Peter Jackson originally negotiated with the government of New Zealand in order to film the trilogy there, it was decided that all sets must be returned to their natural states. When they were in the process of tearing down Hobbiton, a huge storm kicked up that lasted several weeks. During that time, so many tourists came by the farm on which the Hobbiton set was built, that the owners and Peter Jackson convinced the government to make an exception. So all of the hobbit-holes remain, though the decoration from them has been stripped. There was a rumor even when I was there last year that they could perhaps re-use this area for The Hobbit movie (if it ever gets made). Inside of Bag End (Bilbo and Frodo's home), where I am above, is just a small room. About 15 or so people could fit inside of it. They needed the room to be deep enough so that they could shoot the sequence where Gandalf shows up at the door - which is shot from the inside of the house. The Hobbiton set is the only remaining set from all three films. I personally would pay good money if they opened up a bed and breakfast there!


This is what you see when you are looking out from Bag End - that is the big tree that was prominent in Bilbo's birthday scene at the beginning of The Fellowship of the Ring. Isn't it gorgeous? All of that land, as far as the eye can see in all directions, is owned by the same family of farmers. Good investment, peeps!


If you look really closely, you can see little ol' e hugging Bilbo's birthday tree. The guide (who believed hobbits were real, no lie - he ROCKED!) claimed that this was the most famous tree in the world. I love this damn tree, so I agree with him.


Now we've left Matamata and are just outside of Wellington, where we were led by a guy whose brother was one of the top set directors for the trilogy, so he had a ton of cool inside scoop for us. Rivendell, home of the elves, was built in this small, not-too-well-known park. They had so many requests for where exact locations of the movie were that they had to put up little signs like the one above to point people to the right spots. All of my other pictures from here are too embarrassing, sorry!


A short walking distance from downtown Wellington lies the forest in which one of the most famous scenes in the trilogy was filmed. This is exactly the spot where Frodo stood and sensed something was wrong, warning Sam, Merry and Pippin to "Get off the road!!!" That forest was eerie, I tell you!


Now we've made our way down to the south island of New Zealand. A small farm on the outskirts of Queenstown, called Deer Park Heights, is where all of the Rohan scenes were filmed. This farm has also had to make a few changes because of the onslaught of LOTR tourists - they have a one-page printout with a map explaining which scene was shot where, and at the actual locations, as you can see above, there are little posts indicating what number on the map the spot corresponds to. Above is my husband yelling "RIDERRRRS OF THE ROOOHAN!!!" at the top of his lungs, which was one of our favorite things to do whilst in the park.


This picture actually has a funny story behind it. This is the spot where Aragorn fell off the cliff in The Two Towers. Quite a controversial scene since that never actually happened in the books - but a memorable scene nonetheless. Whilst the good news for me was that there is actually not a cliff but rather just a three foot drop in that spot, the bad news is that you have to go down a very steep hill and then up another hill to get to it. When we got there, I saw a few other tourists pull up and I wanted to get to the spot first to get a picture. So I started running down the hill. Unfortunately it had just randomly started hailing, as you can see in the shot above, and the grass was very slick. So I took a huge fall and twisted my ankle - I honestly thought I might have broken it. But I still made it to the spot before the other geeks arrived - though you can tell I'm not feeling too comfortable. Victory at all costs.


This is the "cliff" from afar.


And lastly, here is the area where Arwen raced on horse-back to escape the Black Riders, carrying an ailing Frodo with her. "The Remarkables" are the mountains in the background, which were used as a backdrop often throughout the trilogy.

Ahhhh, the memories. If only I had seen just ONE elf while I was there. The New Zealand tourism board really needs to do something about that. A lot more nerds would be making the trip to Kiwi-land if they could be guaranteed an elf sighting...

- e

Preciously Close!

Now that the Harry Potter books are complete and it's at least another year before the sixth movie comes out, on top of the fact that Lost doesn't return until February and The X-Files movie is still a ways off, I've had precious little to get truly excited about lately in the world of entertainment.

All that changed when I went through the mail pile yesterday and nearly had a heart attack when I found Gollum and his preciousssss staring back up at me. How could I have forgotten about the possibility of The Hobbit being made into a movie? I only have a framed Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring poster hanging on my wall, a Gollum bobblehead peering out at my TV room and a Gandalf doll that yells "YOU... SHALL NOT... PASS!!!" when I prompt him to do so (about every other day - I love that thing!) - you would think I would have kept on top of any LOTR-related news.



If you're interested in reading Entertainment Weekly's cover story, you can find it here. It delves into the ongoing legal battle between Peter Jackson and New Line Cinema - but the gist of the piece is that the tensions are easing and incredible forces are at play that seem to be moving production of The Hobbit closer to happening. I won't claim to understand what all the fighting has been about or which side is right, but I do know enough to be confident that if New Line thinks that fans will be pleased if The Hobbit gets made WITHOUT Peter Jackson, those peeps are smoking some serious crack. There would be a huge backlash from the vocal and powerful LOTR community - not to mention possible protests from some of the actors they would need to join the cast. Ian McKellen has stated on his own web site that he would want to work with Peter again, if asked to reprise his role as Gandalf. Other actors from the LOTR films who wouldn't even appear in The Hobbit, such as Viggo Mortensen (Aragorn), have also spoken out about how Peter Jackson has to be the director if the film finally became a reality: "In their heart of hearts, New Line knows he's ideal."

True nerds can only help that the attention drawn from this latest Entertainment Weekly issue will help move the conciliatory talks along. While I don't love The Hobbit with the same passion I bestow upon the LOTR trilogy, it does have one thing that the other books don't have - a dragon! And you KNOW I love me some dragons!

- e

The iPod, the iPod, the iPod's on Fire!

Here's something to think about the next time you put your iPod in your pocket... a guy's pants burst into flames because his iPod Nano caught on fire! While I realize that this really isn't funny, since he wasn't really hurt, I couldn't help but chuckle at the following:

"Williams said the fact his iPod Nano burst into flames while he was at work was bad enough, where he works could have been another issue. He works at a kiosk in Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport. “If TSA had come by and seen me smoking, they could have honestly thought I was a terrorist,” said Williams."

Apple is going to replace his iPod, but refused to comment on how often this problem has been reported. Hmmmm, that's quite suspicious. Apparently the Nanos (this guy's version was 1.5 years old) used the same lithium ion batteries that were recalled in laptops as they also were prone to igniting.

So the next time you put in your headphones to rock out to your favorite songs - just remember: Stop, drop and roll!

- e

Pet Peeve of the Week: Telemarketers

I haven't done an "official" Pet Peeve of the Week post for nearly three months! How can this be, there's so much to be bitter about!?!

Today's topic was inspired by all of the time I've been spending at home now that I am done with The Man. In my first days of freedom (already about 1.5 months ago, wow...), I was struck by the incredibly high number of phone calls I was receiving while I sat here trying to concentrate on writing blog posts or checking out celebrity gossip or watching YouTube videos - you know, important things. How dare these phone calls interrupt my critical tasks? We didn't have Caller ID, so I wouldn't actually answer any of them, knowing that a voicemail would be left if it was important, or that the person would call back immediately if it was someone I knew (that's the secret code I would give to friends and family - "Call back again right away and then I'll know it's you!" - which annoyed them all greatly).

Not thirty minutes would go by over the course of any given day when the phone wouldn't ring. Soon, I couldn't take it anymore. I found a pretty good package deal online for unlimited long distance calls plus a whole bunch of other phone features, including Caller ID, for $40 a month. Sign me up!

Now I can SEE all of the crazy places that are bugging me, which I'm not sure is any better. By and large, they are either student loan companies, mortgage companies, "debt solution" providers, or satellite dish installers. What's frustrating is that I literally have consolidated my student loans as much as they could possibly be consolidated, and my rate is something ridiculously low like 2.4%, so there's no way I'm messing with them again. Similarly, we're locked into an extremely low mortgage rate for 3 more years, so I'm not going to touch it. I carry no credit card debt and don't have any problems managing my money, and I'm quite happy with my Comcast dish (I probably just jinxed myself). So... alas, I have no need for any of these services and I highly doubt the majority of people they call do, either.

My new tactic is that if I've seen a particular number come through several times, then I will actually answer the call and then immediately ask to be placed on their "no-call list" because "you guys have called me ten bazillion times." The telemarketers are now well-prepared for this request, because they have a whole spiel they read off about how it may still be 2-4 weeks before the calls stop, and on and on. But it seems to have helped a little bit. My service package also came with a feature called Privacy Manager which apparently stops some calls before they even can ring through to you - but I haven't really checked out exactly how it works yet.

The bad news about this new service plan I got is that AT&T screwed up (surprise, surprise) and cut OFF my voicemail service when they turned ON the Caller ID. I had saved and re-saved a particularly funny message left for me by my crazy peeps DY and JP for four YEARS - and now it was gone!!!! Yes, for four full years I had been re-saving this certain voicemail because it always made me laugh. It doesn't take much to make your blogger friend e happy. And now AT&T has ripped away that joyful memory from me. For that reason, I refused to sign back up for their voicemail service. So now I use the digital answering machine on my high-tech new phone that I had to get when my line was all screwed up (which it actually pretty much still is... grrrrr). Since I AM egrrrl and greatly prefer to email people rather than talk on the phone, this hasn't proven to be a problem just yet... the only issue is that if I'm on the line and someone beeps in, it will just keep ringing on their end and not go to voicemail. But at least now I can see who it was that beeped in and call them back if I deem them worthy.

So while I started off this post wanting to vent about telemarketers, it has resulted in me getting all worked up about AT&T again because the wound of losing my favorite voicemail has been re-opened. Damn you, AT&T!

And you KNOW my next bill is going to be totally screwed up because of my new order, too. Prediction: more rants ahead!

But let's end this post on a comical note, shall we? Here is the winner of an old Salon.com challenge to write a telemarketing pitch in the form of haiku:

darkness grows outdoors,
your dinner cools, I waste a
moment of your time
-- Dave Demko

Well said, my good man, well said.

- e